How To Keep A Good Divorce From Turning Ugly

By Carl Roberts

Good divorce is easy
Having a good divorce is easier than you think.

No one in their right mind would choose an ugly divorce if they had experienced it in advance.   Having a good divorce is easy but it does require having the proper mindset. Unfortunately, during divorce good people are often tripped up by their own emotions and negative motivations. Bad advice from friends or lawyers can contribute to poor decision-making which can escalate conflict. Add mental health issues of narcissism and borderline personality disorders to the mix and divorce can get ugly fast.

As with marriage, it takes two to have a successful divorce. That being the case, the questionable behavior of only one party can send everything off the rails. SplitSmart can help couples stay on path for a healthy divorce.

Transparency and Individual Accountability

Think of SplitSmart as divorce guardrails that keep the couple on the straight path to success.  By instilling transparency and individual accountability into the process, it’s easier for everyone to stay on course for a happier divorce ending.

The process of reaching an equitable outcome is actually pretty easy when the couple approaches divorce with integrity and respect. The goal is to move onto life’s next chapter in a relatively peaceful manner. 

Choosing an Amicable Divorce For Parents

This is especially important when children are involved. Most divorcing couples desire parenting plans that work for the entire family. These parents want to support their children, both financially and emotionally, to the best of their ability. 

But for some, the choice of an amicable divorce is taken away due to the actions or choices of the other. The level of hostility can escalate right out of the gate or through ill-advised choices later in the process. Either way the impact can be devastating with both parents as well as children paying the price.

Marital Worksheet

Whether the divorce is mediated or litigated, SplitSmart organizes the financial data into marital worksheets and a unified financial picture. It lists incomes and expenses side by side for comparison.  The key is to ensure transparency throughout the entire process. Transparency leads directly to building trust and reaching equitable agreements more quickly.

SplitSmart saves couples thousands, if not tens of thousands, of dollars in unnecessary legal fees. It also reduces dozens if not hundreds of hours of time. On the money side, SplitSmart reinvents the disclosure and discovery process. In the Intake process, SplitSmart creates a common repository folder for each income, asset or liability.  It enables opposing party audits, history/audit trails and discovery dashboards. The process is streamlined by directly connecting with over 15,000 financial institutions for current balances and verified histories. 

Avoid Conflict: Separate Money and Kid Issues

At SplitSmart we believe the more money issues and kid issues can be separated from one another, the easier it is to solve both.  By distinguishing adult benefit from child benefit, the vast majority of traditional custody and child support conflict is simply avoided. The goal is to build parenting plans based on respect. Treat the other parent as you wish to be treated. Don’t count overnights. Be flexible, accommodate one another, keep the other informed. Above all, promote and encourage your child’s relationship with their other parent. 

SplitSmart’s transparent solution enables families to figure out the best parenting plan that meets the needs of the entire family. Our innovative approach allows each parent to accept, reject or make their own proposal for each individual item of a parenting plan. By negotiating each item one by one, positions tend to soften towards a reasonable agreement. With easier issues solved and harder issues clearly outlined, mediators can efficiently and productively guide parents to compromise and agreement.

Watch our teo explainer videos, one for property division and one for children and parents on: SplitSmart for Couples.

***   ***   ***

Carl Roberts is the founder of SplitSmart, an innovative new app designed to simplify and reduce conflict about divorce custody and financial issues. Both parents, attorneys, mediators and other divorce professionals benefit from this low cost, time-saving tool. Learn more about SplitSmart at www.splitsmart.com.

Leave a Comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Scroll to Top